God of Aww
Well, I am so mellow right now. I just played a fucked up game/ROM called God of Aww. Anyways, I guess I should tell you my story. When I was younger, I owned a PS2, and for my birthday I got a game called God of War II. It was a game meant for adults due to swearing, blood, nudity, sexual references, etc. so my parents got it for me because it didn't look girly and would put hair on my chest. I really wanted to go to the zoo, but the game was great anyways. Anyways I used to love that game. Anyways, I loved playing through it and I laughed a lot. (I would have laughed more if i knew what some of the jokes meant before.) Okay, so earlier today, it was my birthday and I was playing Meet n' Fuck Kingdom on Newgrounds. And I came across a game called "God of War: Maybe 300 sequal :D". The game took five attempts to load properly, then my character spawned in a wall and couldn't move, followed by my browser crashing. After rating it 10/10, I felt an extremely big urge to play the original God of War II. I had already had a PS2 emulator, which I had had already had used to relive games I had and had played. So I googled God of War rom. Exactly like that. After, I hit I'm feeling lucky, I don't remember the site name, because I wanted to play the game. It opened a near blank page with just a button in the middle that said "Busty Russian Women NEED BOYFRIENDS NOW". After I clicked it and knocked one out, I also clicked "Download: God of Aww.zip", I know it sounds dumb that I didn't notice that the name was odd, but I clicked the button anyway. It began to download. When it was done I started playing. Instead of the regular intro, it started with a hyper-realistic Kratos looking directly at me and saying "Hey, what's up?. Anyway the game started with Kratos jumping off Mt Olympus as normal, but instead of landing in Rhodes, when Kratos landed he was in a pleasant meadow full of ducklings and an adorable unicorn. I instantly turned up the volume, and noticed that the background music was now Sugar Sugar by The Archies. Then the screen faded out to a soothing peach color. Then it showed the battle of Rhodes area where you start the game and engage in dark and adult sex minigames. "Finally I can play!" I thought. I pressed B and Kratos swung a lollipop, then put it away. Cool, I get a lollipop instead of the faggy Blades of Athena. Anyways I jumped the fence to butcher the enemy army. But, when I walked up to them, Kratos looked at them and said "All this fighting is pointless, let's go to the zoo" then the enemy soldiers ooked at him and said "Sure". AWW! I thought. I just took a breath and continued, It was true... the battle ended and they all went to the zoo and bought balloons. It was brilliant and they learned all about meercats. Kratos turned to me again, this time holding a mug of hyper-realistic cocoa. "Happy Birthday, I hope it's just as fun next year!", he said. How? How could Kratos has known it was my birthday? Or that I wanted to go to the zoo, but nobody would go with me? Whatever mysterious power created this game, it made my birthday wish come true! When I went back to the ROM site, the link was dead - but I hope it's back next year! Category:Video Games Category:Hyper-Realism Category:Birthday Wishes